Well, hmmm, I’m not a lesbian.
That I know for sure, because I’ve never felt love for a woman,
at least not in the same way as love for a man…
But I certainly love women’s bodies!!
What’s beautiful, is in the eyes of the beholder of course,
but it’s all together with her attitude and her self-perception.
I love them to be healthy and curvy, wich means generous breasts and hips.
But the essence to me is; How does the woman in question perceive her curves?
I find it tedious when some of my girlfriends is harping on her ‘too broad hips’ and her ‘fat thighs’ , while I find them absolutely gorgeous. (hips and thighs, that is)
Exceptionally beautiful woman, but insecure as hell.
And then she wonders why men aren’t interested in her.
Sad, she doesn’t see her beauty at all, she’d rather deny it.
Anyway, what I want to say it: She’s beautiful, but not attractive…rather annoying.
She wants to live up to unrealistic (and, in my eyes, not even attractive) ideals.
Most people don’t look like models, or Hollywood-and Bollywood actresses.
That’s why they’re chosen. And no, don’t try to convince me it was their amazing talent.
Ok, some are talented, but looks play the greatest part.
Anyway, what I wanted to say; We dish ourselves up with ridiculous images.
And some are more vulnerable in absorbing these images as ‘the truth’.
That’s where it goes wrong: devaluating oneself because one can’t meet the reigning standards.
Utopically speaking, a woman (or a man, for that matter) should be able to say to her/himself:
“Yes, she’s tinner than me, and she’s beautiful. But I’m just that beautiful.”
Or, “Yes, her skin is fairer than mine, and she’s beautiful. And I’m dark, but I’m just as beautiful.”
It took me a long time to realize I was beautiful, even with all my flaws.
I just couldn’t believe it, when someone said that to me.
Than I was thinking most likely; “Oh, well, he’s an exception.”
Or “He is exaggerating.”
Little by little, I learned to accept myself.
My body, I learned that it has the right to be admired.
Little by little, I learnt to perceive my body as a part of my sensual and sexual persona.
And…as soon you have this image of yourself as an attractive and sensual creature in your mind…you start to exude that very image.
And it shows in the reactions of my surroundings.
And no, I don’t get nasty and sexually tinted comments.
It shows in the way people smile at you, in the way they let you walk crossing,
in the way they say kindly ‘hello’ or ‘have a good day’.
And it feels good, real good.
The way I feel about myself, that’s the way I perceive other people.
Women, I see them as beautiful sensual creatures, as they supposed to be (in my opinion).
f.ex. when I walk on the street, I firstly notice how a woman walks, the way she moves her hips, how her posture is, and the way she watches other people.
The glance of a (sexually) confident person is warm, warm and caring.
People who have that look in their eyes, appeal to others.
You can notice them by far, you like to befriend them, even taste them.
Two very different people, but they both have ‘the look’.
Now, going back to the body…
I’ve always loved watching women’s bodies.
Especially naked ones
Just naked, not in porn-mode.
I know my mom once catched me watching those images, but she didn’t really take offense at it. My taste of pictures is always good, so why would she
Beautiful women’s bodies…they just emit sexual power.
Yes, we women have sexual power.
Men might have an advantage when it comes to physical strength, but women have another kind of power.
And power, that doesn’t need to have a negative connotation.
When it comes to prostitution, I loved the power of my sexuality, not only for myself, also because I loved to let my man feel good. Good and at ease.
I’m his company, but also because I wanted to let him feel good about himself.
That’s a win-win situation for the two of us.
Another reason I ‘resorted’ to prostitution is because I see women as sexual objectives.
I see women’s bodies as sexual, and I’m not ashamed of saying so.
I see a woman’s body as an objective of sexual attention, and I’m not ashamed to say that either.
I can see her as a source of desire, and fantasy.
Which doesn’t mean that sexual attention has to be delivered inappropriately, of course.
She’s a sexual creature, but still a human being.
Yet there hasn’t been a moment when I deemed my thoughts as disrespectful towards other woman.
I haven’t had to occasion to touch a beautiful woman, unfortunately, but is she’d let me, I would certainly do.
My fantasies are often about a woman, submitted by my careful touch.
Then I would let her discover her sexuality, and would let her pursue her intimate desires, without shame.
That’s on my list still.
To let a woman be at ease with her body and her sexuality, because she deserves that.